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The Night They Invented Poutine

Crackpots
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The Night They Invented Poutine
The night they invented Poutine
It was a most peculiar scene.
Ginette Reno was shy and thin
The Nordiques began to win.
Jacques Parizeau sang "God save the Queen"
The night they invented Poutine.
The night they invented Poutine.

No one knows the precise origin.
Where or when this food did begin
Everybody in Quebec will tell you with a grin.
It was their little village that invented the Poutine.

To be really authentic, the potatoes must be old.
The gravy must be hot and the cheese must be cold.
With a Journal de Montréal wherever it is sold
Served with a roll in a bowl by a troll.

You put some potatoes and some cheese in a tin
But the cheese won't melt till you put the gravy in.
Then it sticks to your fork and it dribbles down your chin
And that's how you know that you're eating a Poutine.

If the French fries are greasy and the gravy's nice and hot
The cheese curds melt as they come out of the pot.
Once in your stomach, they congeal into a knot
If your food does that - Poutine is what you've got

Some use mozzarella, but that isn't really it
And they serve it at McDonald's, but the French fries are shit.
And we hate to be picky, but we have to admit
It's hard to eat when the cook has a zit

Well, there's no way anyone would call it 'Haute Cuisine'
It isn't really junk food, it's something in between
But it's better than a burger or a Mike's submarine.
A balanced diet is a beer and a Poutine
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