We've been playing together for so long that now I can't speak unless he's doing that.
Bizarre.
Yes, I came here many years ago from England,
and I stayed because of something a Canadian girl said to me.
She said,
Okay.
I wasn't used to that.
Back in England, all they ever said to me was,
Would you like something for the swelling?
There's a freedom here.
A freedom of expression.
Take the F-word, for example.
I'd always been told it was a bad word.
But I found out that in Canada, it's not a bad word.
It's not even a word.
It's just a form of verbal punctuation.
Consider this sentence,
Who drank all the beer, fuck?
See, now there, the F-word is being used as a question mark.
Or you might hear this answer,
You drank it all last night, fuck!
So there, of course, the F-word is being used as an exclamation point.
I'd like to pass on my discovery to other immigrants in the form of a short course.
The use of the F-word in Canada.
Present tense, fuck!
Now, if you're Italian, that's a complete sentence.
Oh, no.
Maybe it would have,
It might have a little body language to it, you know.
Maybe a little bow.
A grab.
Fuck.
Fuck.
The past tense, fucked.
Can also be the passive voice, you're fucked.
There's the imperative, fuck you.
And the reflexive, fuck me.
And you may hear these both together, of course, in the combined form, the imperative reflexive.
Oh, fuck yourself.
There's the interrogative, what the fuck?
The ominous.
Oh, fuck.
In moments of great stress, you might hear the religious form,
Holy fuck.
Or perhaps the fecal dismissive,
Fuck that shit!
And in Quebec.
And only in Quebec, you'll hear the French version, fuck you.
It's fuck you.
It sounds the same, but it's spelled differently.
According to le dictionnaire de la langue québécoise de Léandre Bergeron,
the word fuck you is spelled F-O-K-E, accent-dégue.
But you have to be careful because sometimes it's spelled F-O-K-E, accent-dégue.
Because the object that is fucked may be feminine.
Now, this word was first uttered on television in Canada by the late René Levesque.
When he said, it was fuck you.
And then a journalist remarked that this was a bad word in English.
So Mr. Levesque said, I fucked up.
And then he fucked up.
I love this country!