They Kicked Us Out

Schwartz's The Musical
Preview: 0:00 / 0:00 | Original: 3:18
They Kicked Us Out
They Kicked Us Out

It began two thousand years ago, or maybe it was three
They started kicking Hebrews out wherever we might be
They drove us out of Poland we were hassled in Ukraine
Romania, ironically, did not let us remain

From, Latvia, Estonia, and Poland we were bounced.
Where there's a bunch of place names that we never could pronounce
From Moldova to Bukovina, and as we were dismissed
You could hear us shout "We've been thrown out
Of better joints than this!"

Russia's so enormous that they found a special trick
That funny dance the Cossacks do is basically a kick
And even in Trans Nistria they put us on a list
Yes they tossed us out of places that don't even exist!

- Google it!
- Kugel? I make the best kugel.

Ejected by Slovenia and exiled by the Greeks
Thrown out by Macedonia where we only stayed two weeks
Then Russia - much to our surprise - let us all return
And then they kicked us out again. It's sad. We never learn.

They kicked us out of Africa, they kicked us out of Spain
They kicked us into Portugal, which kicked us out again
For years and years from place to place we've had to shlep our stuff
We've heard a thousand different ways to say the phrase "Fuck off!"

- such language!
- what? Fakov? It's Russian.

But they couldn't take away from us our profound belief
In God and in each other, and the cheapest cuts of beef
As long as there's one guy who knows the proper way to slice
A brisket's fine, when soaked in brine
You'll find it always tastes divine
That's why I came and stood in line
It's why we both came here to dine
It's why I'm still waiting for mine
It's aging like a vintage wine In barrels full of spice
- Nice!
words and music by George Bowser and Rick Blue
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