Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Men from America to Asia
Got benign prostatic hyperplasia

This is the masculine heel of Achilles
The stopper that stops up the spout
It's got something to do with the birds and the bees
That we're slightly embarrassed about

Who knows why it starts to expand?
Who knows what is the trigger
We middle-aged men simply don't understand
Why the prostate starts getting bigger
When we get

Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Men from America to Asia
Got benign prostatic hyperplasia

"It's really ironic, at my time of life,"
Says the middle-aged man with a frown.
"But in some ways now I'm a lot like my wife
- We both have to pee, sitting down."

A once steady stream is now starting and stopping
As the prostate tightens the nose
And all over the nation the old men are shopping
For diapers and cranberry juice
and singing

Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Men from America to Asia
Got benign prostatic hyperplasia
That's right

It's sad what happens to a man
When he starts getting older
And the doctor says there's no need to worry
Unless you feel both of my hands on your shoulders

It's so sad to be lying there
Face down on the couch
The doctor gives you a digital rectal exam
And then he's the one who says "ouch!"
You've got

Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Men from America to Asia
Got benign prostatic hyperplasia
One more time

Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Benign prostatic hyperplasia
Men from America to Asia
Got benign prostatic hyperplasia