Dress British - think Yiddish

If only you could speak some Yiddish
And a little bit Hebrew
With a little effort
And a little luck
You wouldn't be a schmuck
Like you

When you talk Yiddish there`s always a way
To say exactly what you mean
You can be precise
But you don`t have to be nice
And you never need to be obscene

There's a tedious guy in my neighbourhood
I try to avoid him but it does no good
I can't get away but I wish I could
I know him - a noodge

When even though I've got no pep
I still have to go out to the dep
And through deep snow i have to step
Face it - you're a shlep!

If only you would learn some Yiddish
Any little thing at all
We could make a hoo ha
People would go oo la
We could have a Matzoh Ball

There’s this woman who says
She'll call me tomorrow
She's raising funds and I can't ignore her
It cost me a c-note last time I saw her
What is she?
She's a shnorrer

Let's say I'm sharing a couple of brews
With someone whose connections I'd like to use
When I'd rather be home watching the news
It's a verb - to schmooze

If you only had a little Yiddish
In your little goyshe kop
All the other goyim
How you could annoy em
I can tell you they would plotz

Whatever that means
Let's learn a few basic words, try 'chutzpah'
Chutzpah
When you say the `ch` sound, I wanna hear phlegm
Hitting the floor! Try it again!
Chutzpah!
Mazel tov. Try 'shnook'
Chinook? Isn't that a hot wind from Alberta?
No, that's Ralph Klein
And he's not a shnook?
Aah!

Now that I am thinking Yiddish
I'll have to check into a spa
Look at my belly
When I think of Deli
It's not a place in India

Shnook
Putz
Schmuck
Schlemiel
Shnook
Putz
Schmuck
Schlemiel
Shnook
Schmuck
Shlemozzle
Klutz!