In Shakespeare's time, a cut piece was an item of renown. Nobles wore them, even workmen, on the job.
When they dug up Herculaneum, there were fally everywhere, And in Pompeii, it was chic to show your knob.
But now phallic symbol is a derogatory term, And the willy has gone into decline.
And while only lowbrow comics snigger at the trouser worm, I'll be damned if I should be ashamed of mine.
I've got a great big dick, I've got a great big dick.
I've got a great big dick, I've got a great big dick.
It's seven inches long and fourteen inches thick, My great, great, great, great, great big dick.
I've got a great big dick, I've got a great big dick.
Thinks he's the energizer bunny.
I call it Rubik, yes Rubik is its name, The more you play with it, the harder it appears.
And to be really honest, it's just like that awful game, In that nobody has played with it for years.
And lest the stimulus should make it harder, It's just a tiny, harmless household pet.
But as Adam said to Eve years ago in the garden, Stand back, we don't know how big this thing'll get.
I've got a great big dick, I've got a great big dick.
Actually, I've got three.
Well, two that we can see.
A great big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big dick.