This year is a cross between country music and rap music. We like to call it
crap music. Now Bill Cosby has proved that it's possible to be funny without
being disgusting. And Andrew Dice Clay has shown that it's also possible to be
disgusting without being funny. Now we'd like to show you that it's funny to be
disgusting without being possible.

Every evening at the bars you'd see her arrive
Wandering around from dive to dive
Kind of bony at the shoulder, and wide at the hip
And these two words were on her lips
More cocks!

She had a mattress strapped onto her back
Kind of made her look like half of a Big Mac.
She had a years worth of condoms in a paper bag
And if a guy wouldn't oblige her she'd call him a fag.

More cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!
More big cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!

Y'all sing along now, here.

As far as you can get from where Venus is
Was this old bag screaming for penises.
She was short and ugly and oversexed
And her favorite four letter word was 'next!'
More cocks!

At the Edmonton Mall she walked inside
Put up a sign and called herself a ride.
It was a tunnel of love, she laid on her back.
Ten guys went in and they never came back.
More cocks!

More cocks! More cocks!
More big cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!

Shit this song is good.

In her bedroom on the walls
Are stuffed and mounted cocks and balls.
It's a trophy room for a big game dame
Underneath each donger is some guy's name.
More cocks!

She ain't the kind of gal who'd up and marry
Any old Tom or Dick or Harry.
She says Tom's a bum and Harry's a hick
But I've just got time for one more dick.
More cocks!

More cocks! More cocks!
More big cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!

I got this tune from Long John Poultry.

Down on the farm when she was a child
She tried to figure out a way to grow penises wild.
She said: "forget fields of corn swaying in the breeze.
I want to wade through wangers up to my knees."
More cocks!

She likes 'em big, she likes 'em small.
She'll never rest till she's had 'em all.
White man, black man, Arab or Jew.
One of these days she's gonna come after you.
More cocks!

More cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!
More big cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!

Here comes the sad part.

She got drunk one day, fell flat on her face
Ten truckers yelled out, "there's a parking space!"
She said come on fellas now, don't be chicken.
I can take a dicking and keep on ticking.

More cocks!

She died of grief one day when she heard
That a cockatoo was just a goddamn bird.
On her tombstone there's a little rhyme that says,
"So many cocks, so little time."

More cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!
More big cocks!
More cocks! More cocks!

Oh this one's going all the way. I feel it. I think we got ourselves a hint here.
I'm gonna go out and buy me a Cadillac right now. Black on black.
I see movies, royalties. I see merchandise, Saturday morning cartoons, all kinds of goodies coming in.