When I was just a baby, I recall
I had no hair upon my head at all
My granddad saw me crying, and he sat me on his knee
He said, "I'm as bald as you are,
and one day you will see -
Bald is beautiful, Bald is beautiful
Bald is beautiful, Bald is beautiful."

So I grew up and I went searching for the way - and the truth
And my hair kept getting longer, and longer every day
Then I met a Guru, and he looked at me and he said
"You will never see the truth until you shave your head."

Brothers, give up all of your worldly possessions and gaze upon your belly button
Brothers and sisters, this bald head is not an absence of hair. It is a presence - of head
And when the sun is glinting on my dome, I am sending out a beacon of intergalactic universal love to all creation
Because, grasshopper, I am free, free from the coils of the cosmetic industry
From the bondage of the barber shop and the slavery of the salon
No more fiddling with my follicles, I have brushed off my brush, I have no use for mousse, and I'm through with shampoo
Listen
Bald is beautiful
Oh, like a glazed guru
Bald is beautiful
I am like a plucked priest
Bald is beautiful
I am a smooth swami
Bald is beautiful
Would you mind changing the key? That's not quite enough - do it again
One more time please. Thank you
Bald is beautiful
Oh, raise your voices children
Bald is beautiful
And the grown-ups too
Bald is beautiful
I love it when they do that
Let's not need to see everyone coming together, shake your hands
Bald is beautiful
Join us in thinking
Bald is beautiful
I am becoming deeply moved
Bald is beautiful
Nowput your hand on your neighbor's head and rub his head and feel his weakness of it
Put your hand on his head and that's right
Put your hand here
I am feeling it now
Bald is beautiful
Oh, I love them
I can feel true love now